Although today I had all intentions of giving you some additional background on the evolution of this project, I got side-tracked this morning by, well of course, an email I received from a 35-year-old lawyer on OKC; we'll just refer to him here as "DB". Basically it went like this:
Me: Would you be interested in chatting sometime?
DB: Sorry, but I am not interested in dating someone with children at this point in my life.
Me: Totally understand that...because what I am really looking for is a replacement daddy for them, someone that will allow me to be a stay-at-home mom and watch them while I go to play tennis with my girlfriends at the country club, all while I am screwing my tennis coach. :/
DB: Wow. That is completely unnecessary and if you cannot understand why someone would not necessarily want to be with someone who already has children, then I feel sorry for you. It has nothing to with being a "replacement daddy."
Me: Don't take it so personally. I really do understand. You are not the first person to not be interested in dating me because I have children. I get it, but it's also very close-minded because you don't know anything about me or my situation with my children. However, if you choose to completely write off someone for no other reason than that they have children, so be it…but I feel sorry for you as well for being so narrow-focused in your search. Have you ever dated anyone with children?
DB: No, I have not.
Me: Exactly. So, instead of having tunnel vision, take a look beyond the box - you may be pleasantly surprised by what is out there and what those things have to offer. Now, you are 35 and have never been married, correct? Perhaps maybe you're searching for something that doesn't exist or maybe you haven't found what you really want in a cute, young 26 year old who perhaps still is a size 2 because she hasn't pushed out any kids yet but substantively, she may not have too much between her ears, let alone much life experience…just saying. Regardless though, I appreciate your honesty in telling me you wouldn't date me because I have children…you're right…it would never work. I would eat you and your shallowness alive and then vomit it up on a platter, which I would then serve to you for dinner on a silver platter while I was wearing fuzzy stiletto heels and fishnets. Furthermore, you clearly wouldn't be able to handle a strong independent woman with a career and life beyond just waiting for your phone call after a night of poker with the boys.
DB: Talk about shallow and making assumptions. Your defense mechanism of lashing out and stereotyping others is unattractive.
Me: Yes, yes it is. I am incredibly unattractive and uncouth. Yet, you are still continuing to engage with me.
Can you say, “ironic”?